Don't You Worry Your Pretty Little Mind
by Jbsullivan17
Summary: "Echo broke up with you? Why?" "If I tell you, you have to promise not to laugh." "Laugh at..?" She prodded and now Bellamy is going to make her work for it. "Tell me my life story again." Clarke rolled her eyes but told him everything, down to how he got the scar on his upper lip. "And what's not included in that story?" "I don't know, it took me an hour, probably could have gone
1. Don't You Worry Your Pretty Little Mind

Bellamy didn't care, it was his normal. He spent his whole life outside of school taking care of his sister and once it'd gotten to the point with his mother's health that meant working two after school jobs and having no time on the weekends for any fun so sex was never really on his radar.

After he graduated he stayed in town, taking care of his family until his mother passed two years later and he became Octavia's guardian and they fought over him going to college. She can go to high school anywhere, but if he wants to have more than minimum wage jobs for the rest of his life, he needs to go to college.

He disagreed until there were acceptance forms in the mail and he gave Octavia a disapproving looks when she came home from one of her many babysitting jobs.

"Your money is supposed to go towards your college, not mine."

"You going to college gets us both out of here. Factory Station sucks!"

"This wasn't your responsibility! And I want to see what the hell you wrote for my essays!"

At the end of it, he decided on Ark U in Virginia, certainly better than Newark, NJ, and they understood his situation with Octavia, allowing him to have an apartment off campus as long as he participated in a sport and he told them he's good at soccer, which wasn't true but wasn't false either because he stopped playing sports when Octavia was born when he was seven and standard gym classes.

They moved when she finished the school year in June, she started a job at a café soon after, quickly making friends with her coworkers, having sleepovers and letting Bellamy have free time which he filled with work at a bar down the road, making friends with one of the guys, Miller.

He found out that he was good at defense, so he was on the soccer team and he added a job at the book store on top of the bar off campus. Octavia convinced him to let her keep her café job that was halfway between her school and their apartment on the condition that her grades don't drop. It was great, they had a schedule, a routine and Octavia always let her know when she was staying at Clarke's or Raven's after her shift, they live closer to the café apparently and they never came over, which was fine with him as long as Bellamy didn't see anything more than pedicures and movie marathons on O's Instagram and snapchat, he was a happy brother/guardian.

Octavia informed him one night at the bar where she was sitting behind the bar doing her homework, she was grounded for sneaking out, that one of the girls was hitting on him. "Actually more than one," she amended with a chuckle.

"Shut up, O," he growled as Miller gave him a look from across the bar.

And that was how he started dating Roma. He invited her over more than they went out and she was happy with that because he could cook. And once O wasn't grounded she finally invited Clarke over and that night turned into a disaster with the bickering and name calling and he's most definitely going to continue calling her Princess just for the look in her eyes when he says it.

He and Roma were together a while and they had fun, maybe, but she was freaked out with the whole virgin thing, not wanting to teach him what she likes because not everyone is into it so, without even letting him in on what she likes verbally, they ended and Clarke became a staple in his house along with Raven, though their relationship seemed strained at some points it wasn't his place to ask, and he invited Miller one night after shift for some R & R via the new Shadow of War that O got him for his birthday but her friends played before he even got to really look at.

There was a knock on the door after two am and Bellamy had the urge to ignore it because it wasn't Octavia because she was at Raven's and she had a key, so when he heard his name through the thin walls, he practically ran to the door, finding an extremely drunk Clarke leaning against it and he caught her before she fell to the ground.

"Your apartment was closer than my dorm," she somehow managed coherently into his neck.

"Where's the fire, Princess?"

She groaned at the nickname. "Sorority party at the bar, I'm surprised Miller didn't call you it, it was…" she shook her head which was a bad idea since she immediately stopped with her eyes widened. "Can I crash? Your couch is more comfortable than my bed."

"Yeah, yeah, O's not home, she's with Raven so you can have her bed though don't puke in it. Wait, you're in a sorority?"

"Yep," she said with an emphasis on the P.

Bellamy nodded, taking her to O's room, bringing the waste basket over from her desk next to Clarke's head. He looked at her, passed out once her head hit the pillow and Bellamy quietly grabbed Advil from the medicine cabinet and a glass of water, setting them on the nightstand Octavia insisted on at their latest Ikea venture in Woodbridge.

Clarke was still passed out in the morning so Bellamy took a shorter jog, coming home to find her still passed out so he showered, made a pot of coffee and while that was going he was cooking himself an omelet when she stepped into the kitchen groggily. 'That smells amazing," she grumbled, leaning back against the counter, hugging her glass of water.

"You want one?"

"Coffee for now?"

Bellamy nodded, grabbing a mug from the cabinet and poured her a cup, leaving room for the gross almond milk Octavia had stocked in the fridge for her, but she just took the mug and drank it black, just like him.

"Thank you," she said quietly after drinking some coffee.

"No problem," he nodded, plating his omelet and grabbed a fork from the drainer. "You could have called me, though, it's not safe to walk home after two in the morning."

"I don't have your number and Miller was busy and you've never liked me."

"Not true," he grimaced, forking his delicious breakfast into his mouth. "Are you sure you don't want any?"

"No, I'm good. I should probably get going though, I have a shift in two hours."

"Tell O I say hi."

Clarke nodded and laughed slightly, "This totally looks like a walk of shame."

"Then you'll be happy to know that my neighbors are all college kids having their own one night stands, you'll just be the only one that didn't get laid."

"What happened with Roma? You two seemed to have really been hitting it off but then you just ended."

"Two different places in life, she didn't really get the whole Octavia thing, but don't tell her that because there was a lot more complicated stuff in there that rooted deeper."

Clarke nodded like she understood. "Raven and I have the same ex."

Bellamy grimaced, sensing there was more to the story.

"We dated him at the same time and didn't know. We found out and both broke up with him, blaming him instead of each other. We don't have much in common, but we got through that together so we don't really drift too far. We're good shoulders for each other but we're also just so different. Octavia brings us closer, she's a force."

"She got into college without me knowing, so I'm well aware of what kind of force she is," Bellamy laughed.

Clarke nodded and Bellamy ate his omelet.

She handed him her phone and he didn't understand for a moment before it all clicked. He texted himself so they'd both have their numbers and Clarke snapped a picture of him with his mouth disgustingly full of his breakfast, setting it as his contact photo before laughing and thanking him again as she placed her coffee mug in the sink and headed out, back to her apartment.

* * *

After that night, Clarke and Bellamy became friends… maybe. They texted, argued a lot mostly (politics, social etiquette and social ethics simultaneously, and mostly about the mandatory prerequisite psych class they're both in), but they were civil—mostly.

They brought their people together for a St. Patrick's Day party at his and Octavia's apartment, he let O drink because she wasn't going anywhere and he wasn't going to drink more than one beer, literally nurse it the whole night. Miller came, leaving the two new-adjacent bartenders to their own devices on the momentous alcoholic holiday, he brought his boyfriend and his doctor friend that Bellamy vaguely remembered meeting once during a shift at the bar. But the rest of the people were friends of Clarke's. Raven, Monty, Jasper, Harper, Maya, Zoe "Monroe" Monroe, and a bunch of other people that he couldn't remember the names of and it wasn't exactly that he hated that he didn't know many people, it just irked him that he didn't know all the names and faces in his personal space.

By the end of the night, Clarke was crowded in his favorite chair making out with a brunette girl that he didn't like when he met her three hours ago, always inputting her opinion when it wasn't asked for or wanted. It'd happened five times, her butting into a conversation giving them advice and saying how much better their lives would have been if they'd done whatever situation the way she said to.

Bellamy didn't like her and he was never going to (it definitely had nothing to do with his feelings for Clarke, what feelings?)

She had a fight with Lexa the night before at the end of semester party, they were both pretty trashed and Bellamy knew they didn't mean half of what was said even though it was about him. He had become Clarke's best friend over the semester just as she became his so it wasn't really a surprise that she turned to him, staying the night at his apartment, in his bed, while he took the couch. Octavia doesn't like having a drunk Clarke in her bed.

It's now morning and they're both hungover as hell, on their second pot of coffee and seventh episode of Disjointed, Clarke's head in Bellamy's lap as he stroked circles into the skin of her shoulder.

She turned and looked up at him and Bellamy ignored it, knowing she'll say it when she's ready. "Bell," she said softly and he worried that he might have heard some nervousness in her voice.

"Yeah?" he smiled down at her.

"Would you drive me to the airport tomorrow?"

"What?" he asked, certain he didn't hear her correctly, she'd never mentioned leaving before.

"I'm going to Maine for the summer. My mom is marrying some councilman and wants me to get to know him before the wedding in the beginning of August, just in time for me to come back for the new semester."

"Why didn't I know about this?"

"Because I didn't know how to tell you."

"You told Octavia?"

"Almost everyone knows, I tried telling you, but I didn't—I don't know, Bellamy, I didn't want it to be real and telling you made it real and I'd rather you take me to the airport than take a taxi."

"What about your car."

"You'll have it. Seriously, use my car while it's here, it'd need to be driven and you're working at the library across town, this will be quicker than the bus."

Bellamy grimaced, taking a gulp of coffee, burning his throat. "I couldn't just use your car."

"Yes, you can. I've seen you drive before, you're an old man; you won't get a ticket or park illegally. I trust you."

Bellamy rolled his eyes but reluctantly agreed, only because he has to take Octavia to lacrosse camp a few blocks away too.

They laid around all day, each taking turns napping and making food or more coffee and Bellamy asked if she needed to go home and pack but she sighed, curling deeper into him after a grueling phone call with Lexa that she took in his bedroom and could nearly hear every word on her end perfectly, but he knew better than to push her when it came to Lexa.

"It's all in my car," she sighed, her breath tickling his neck.

"You came prepared," he laughed softly.

"I knew I had to go, I just didn't know who I was going to ask."

Bellamy smiled, happy she chose him.

She kissed his cheek goodbye when she dropped him off the next day and Bellamy didn't know what to do, he watched her walk away, into the airport and off to Maine.

* * *

His summer was anticlimactic. He jumped from the library to the bar almost every day. He met Gina, the part time bartender, and hung out with her some, kissed a few times before deciding to just be friends and Bellamy was kind of upset about it, but he'd gotten accustomed to being Clarke's boyfriend even though he wasn't Clarke's boyfriend, they weren't like that.

She texted him a week before she arrived back and he smiled, missing her more than anything, smiling at the picture of her in the maid of honor dress, one of her annoyed and another of her happy for her mother finding love again, though their relationship still strained. She asked if he were available to pick her up at one, his shift at the library was luckily a half shift that day and ended at noon so he said yes and told Miller he couldn't work that night.

He picked her up, literally when he hugged her hello, he just couldn't believe she was finally back. The radio silence was killing him on top of seeing her in the bridesmaid dress, he was in awe of her, really.

"What do you want to do?" he asked when they neared his apartment.

"I have to see Lexa, we… I don't know, we fought practically every day, but I think it was mostly the distance. If we're here, we should be good again," she shrugged, pulling into the Wendy's drive thru, a baconator was just what she needed after a four hour flight.

"And you're doing it tonight?"

"I don't know, I'm tired, I haven't been sleeping well so maybe tomorrow?"

"You can hang out at my place, Octavia would love to see you and we can start the last season of The Fall."

"You are so using Jaime Dornan's sex appeal against me and it's working."

"I was thinking more Gillian Anderson, but yes."

"She's hot too, but it's all about Jaime Dornan in that, you know that, now if we're talking about her Media portrayal of Marilyn Monroe in American Gods, I'd agree that she's hot."

Bellamy shook his head, Ricky Whittle looks too much like Lincoln for him to enjoy the show. And that's not to say that Bellamy didn't try to like the show, he tried to see the differences between them but in all honesty, Ricky and Lincoln could be twin brothers and Bellamy can't look at Ricky Whittle for an hour without wanting to punch Lincoln when he sees him.

"Thanks for bring that up," he groaned and Clarke pulled the car up to the drive-thru and ordered her meal, looking to Bellamy, knowing he can't resist a chili baked potato.

She ordered for them both because they're that close and have probably spent too many drunken nights walking through the drive thru.

"How was your summer?" she asked, mouth full of fries.

"Boring, I tried seeing someone but there was something missing. There's always something missing apparently. It's what they all say."

"That sucks, I'm sorry. We should have a party with all our friends, and yes, you have more friends than Miller and I so we should all do something."

"Are you serious?"

"It can be at my place if you're that worried about it."

"I'm not worried, I'm just… it's weird having more than you, Miller ad O."

"Mm," Clarke chuckled, turning into the parking garage under his building. "But healthy."

"Because I care about my mental health?"

"You really should. It's the foundation of wellness," Clarke stated pulling the car into his parking spot and turned the car off and looked over at Bellamy in the low light of the parking lot. "Shit, I sound like my mother. Remind me not to go back there for a whole summer again, I really don't want to turn into her."

"And you think I want you to? Hell no. met her once, hate her. You could never be her, you're way too nice," he smirked, getting out of the car and headed to the elevator, knowing Clarke would rush after him. No luggage, she owns too many clothes.

"What are you doing?" she laughed, catching up, her half eaten burger in hand.

"I'm heading to my apartment to watch The Fall, what are you doing?"

"I—you said I'm nice."

"You were the Ice Princess, but you've changed, you—you're nicer than you were."

"You realize that's because you were nice first. You took care of me when you could have sent me home."

"Where my sister was sleeping and you'd storm in waking her up? I don't think that'd have ended well for you."

* * *

Nine months later, Bellamy shoved the door open and stormed in, dropping his book bag and keys on the bench before collapsing on the couch, his head propped up on Clarke's thigh.

"Did you somehow move in here without my knowing?" he asked, sounding much more annoyed than he actually was at the sight of her in his apartment. It made the next conversations in his life easier and more embarrassing, awesome.

"Nope, living out of my car in your parking garage. Someone ought to be using the parking spot you pay for."

"Ought?" he smirked as her arm came down, resting on his chest.

"Shut up. Good day?"

"The day the earth stood still," he told her and Clarke's jaw dropped.

"Echo broke up with you? Why?"

"If I tell you, you have to promise not to laugh."

"Laugh at..?" She prodded and now Bellamy is going to make her work for it.

"Tell me my life story again."

Clarke rolled her eyes but told him everything, down to how he got the scar on his upper lip.

"And what's not included in that story?"

"I don't know, it took me an hour, probably could have gone longer but those were the most interesting points."

"And not one of those stories was how I lost my virginity because punchline: it's not lost."

"You're a virgin?" Clarke scoffed, completely disbelieving the immensely probable fact.

"That I am."

"Well, I don't see the big deal, it's…" Clarke shrugged. "It's fixable."

"What every guy wants to hear," Bellamy rolled his eyes.

"She dumped you for being a virgin?"

"She doesn't want to teach me because what she likes isn't everyone's favorite flavor."

"Well, there's vanilla and chocolate and swirl but then there's pineapple pistachio which probably is her favorite ice cream flavor if I even care to think about the heartless bitch. Which I don't, especially now. And she couldn't even teach you the basics? Wait. How many girls have broken up with you over this?"

"How many girlfriends have I had?" Bellamy asked, still confused over Clarke's ice cream analogy. Pineapple pistachio?

"So Echo and Roma? Did you tell Gina or were you guys not…"

"She didn't know."

Clarke nodded, "Do you want to?"

"What?"

"Do you want to have sex?"

"You do know you can't ask that without meaning it?"

"Yes," Clarke rolled her eyes and looked at him again. "I'll teach you the basics."

"I'm not going to be your charity case."

"I honestly thought we'd gotten past that," she shook her head. "Anyway, I haven't gotten laid in a while so it'd be good for me too."

"You want to have sex with me?"

"I want to have sex and you need to have sex and from what I can see you aren't exactly opposed to the idea," she smirked, looking past his face to his hard cock uncomfortably confined in his jeans.

"That still doesn't mean us having sex is a good idea."

"Fine, we'll just stay here and watch Legally Blonde and…"

Bellamy groaned, Clarke knew he hated the movie, no matter how important it was to the feminist movement, he hated it with a passion. "No, lets… let's do this in my room where Octavia won't walk in on us."

"Priorities. We need boundaries too."

"Boundaries?"

"Yeah, like no kissing, it's a onetime thing, no feelings, and we don't act awkward with each other afterwards."

"You seem to have everything under control. Anything else?"

"No feelings."

Bellamy smirked, "You said that already."

"Statistically you fall in love with who you lose your virginity to so I'm reiterating."

"My preemptive apologies, Princess," he said, standing and walking to the kitchen for a glass of water, he didn't want to seem too anxious and excited. He wanted this, he may not like Clarke's rules since he may already be breaking the no feelings one, not that he was going to tell her that.

"You're such a loser," she said with a smile, taking his hand and leading him to his bedroom.

"That's giving me a lot of incentive," he grumbled walking down the hall behind her and the exaggerated sway in her steps.

She closed the door behind them and yanked the shirt over her head with little to no finesse. "Incentive enough for you?"

Bellamy gaped at her dark blue lace bra, wondering if she wore lace all the time because it's fucking sexy as hell, and of course her tits are amazing!

"Bellamy, do something."

He gaped at her a moment longer, not exactly believing this was real and pulled his own shirt off.

"Not what I was going for, but good enough," she smiled, stepping closer to him to run a hand down his chest and abs, they weren't well defined, but he worked out enough that there was more muscle than fat. "I didn't think this through," she grimaced and leaned in, pressing her lips to his collarbone.

That broke Bellamy out of his stupor, he surged forward, latching his lips to her pulse point, kissing a line down her neck and collarbone before pulling her into him by the waist and lifting her, her legs wrapping around his hips with a yelp before he carried her to his bed, depositing her there gently, kissing down her chest, gently biting at her breasts through her bra, letting her dictate her boundaries with them, it may be too much, he didn't really know, but sex, that didn't involve breasts so… yeah, her decision, he is going to take her jeans off though.

He trailed his mouth down her stomach, his fingers light on her sides, trailing down to her jeans, lightly tugging, biting at her stomach until she was squirming under him. "Bell," she breathed and he smirked, she wants him now.

He unbuttoned her jeans and pulled them down her thighs with her help lifting her hips for him. He purposely left her panties on and she grimaced at him, annoyed.

"Just because I'm a virgin doesn't mean I don't know how to pleasure, Princess," he said, realizing that nickname is going to have a totally different meaning after this.

Clarke gasped when he kissed her inner thigh, in complete understanding of what he was insinuating, spreading her thighs more for him. The dark spot on her white cotton panties was enticing and all he wanted to do was press his tongue up against it, giving her the pressure she desired, but she was in a teasing mood so he had to tease her back, sucking kisses along her inner thighs, against her panty line, literally everywhere she didn't want him.

"Please, Bellamy," she begged for the tenth time and he relented, licking a stripe up her sex, through her panties and she moaned, pushing back against his mouth, wanting more.

"You want these panties gone, babe?"

"Yes, please, Bell. I need—"

"Oh, I know what you need, I just wanted to hear you beg for it."

She slapped his shoulder and he chuckled against her thigh as he hooked his thumbs under the band of her panties and she lifted her hips to help him tear them off.

He had the urge to tell her she's beautiful, but didn't know if it was breaking a rule or if it was an unspoken rule that he shouldn't compliment her on something he's noticed since they met. He probably should have done that before he pulled her underwear off.

He stared at her for a moment, naked, open and wanting and he felt so lucky. Not because he was going to lose his virginity to his best friend and the girl he's been secretly crushing on for nearly a year, but because she really was something to marvel at. She's a pre-med student with an art minor. She always made time for her friends, even during midterms and finals, but then again, she's a genius so that wasn't really a surprise.

She whimpered, bringing him back and he dove in, his hands pushing her thighs a little further to give him more room as his tongue licked at her slit and her fingers delve into his hair, tugging him, begging for more as his lips wrapped around her clit sucking hard while her tongue laved over it quickly before he changed the tempo, slowing it down maddeningly and she whined and Bellamy didn't hear anything as beautiful in his life.

"More… Bell, please, more!"

He pulled back, her fingers in his hair tugging harder than she probably intended and Bellamy growled, he trailed his fingers up and down her slit easily, teasingly, soaking them in her juices before giving her exactly what she asked for.

His tongue finds her clit, circles it with precision that is maddening, even for him. And he's pressing her thighs further apart with one hand and fucking her on the other and fuck, she's gorgeous, squirming under him. He pushes two fingers into her perfectly, they curl inside her, hook forward, and he's hitting her just right. They were both groaning, desperate and broken sounds coming from the both of them and Bellamy didn't care, this was just as good for him as it was for her. He loved pleasuring women, having them come undone on his tongue and fingers, and it didn't help that Clarke tasted utterly amazing and he couldn't get enough. He could spend the rest of his life between her thighs without complaint. His mouth closes over her clit once again and he matches his relentless fingers with soft suction and lazy strokes of his tongue.

She came with a cry, her walls fluttering around his fingers as he worked her through her orgasm and once her breathing steadied he pulled his fingers out of her and was about to lick them clean when Clarke grabbed his wrist and pulled his fingers up and into her mouth, lapping at them viciously with complete eye contact.

"So you're really good at that, I—I don't have any pointers for you there. You get an A-plus," she sighed.

"I'm getting graded, Princess?"

"I'm your teacher, Blake, of course you're going to be graded on your performance."

Bellamy chuckled, getting up off his knees and sat on the bed next to her.

"Why the hell are you still wearing pants?"

"Because you got distracted," he played right back. He loves their playful banter.

"Fuck," she scampered up off the mattress and her legs wobbled and he reached out for her hip to steady her just before she pushed him down on the bed.

"I really don't want a blow job," he said slightly nervous, he really didn't need to know what her mouth could do after what her tongue just did to his fingers.

"I don't think I've ever heard those words in my life."

"I'm just saying that if you give me one, that'll be it for me."

"So I owe you one?"

Bellamy shrugged, onetime thing. "If you want, I won't hold it against you if you change your mind."

"Right," Clarke nodded, undoing his jeans and pulled them off him along with his boxers before straddling him again with a wicked smile. "Do you have condoms?"

"I—honestly, they're probably expired," he grimaced, hating that he hadn't thought about that until this moment.

"Um, I—I'm clean and on the pill and you're clean right?"

"Yeah," he smirked, knowing she meant blow jobs and herpes but really didn't want to think about that.

"Okay," she breathed nervously. "I'm not going to look in O's room because I'm pretty sure you don't want to know."

"I'd like to know she's using protection, but I really don't want to think about my sister right now."

"Right, yeah, uh, I've never not used a condom."

Bellamy's known Clarke long enough to see that she's freaking out a little so he drew circles on her hips to soothe her, but he saw that it just creeped her out a little more than he intended, bringing one up to her waist and gripping softly there. "Okay, we—we don't have to."

Clarke shook her head vehemently, "No!" Her boobs jiggling but Bellamy forced himself to keep eye contact, Clarke knew how effective her boobs are so it wouldn't be a surprise, but Bellamy was trying to stick to the rules and he felt that it somehow broke those rules. "I want to, I'm on the pill I know I won't get pregnant, but it's still… there's the boundary and this… it's not too much, but it's not going to be the same."

Bellamy nodded. "Clarke, I'm fine with whatever you want, it's your body so whatever you're comfortable with is what we'll do."

Clarke nodded, looking to where their hips met and he wondered what she was thinking in that exact moment because her face did this cute tick thing where there might have been a smile coming on but she steeled herself and used her hand to guide his cock between her folds as she slowly lowered herself down onto him.

"Fuck," he breathed, she felt fucking amazing.

She shuttered a breath when he was inside her to the hilt and she stayed there a moment and Bellamy waited for her to move before he did anything, letting her adjust to the size or whatever it was.

She pushed up and slammed down onto him and fuck, that was somehow better than her sliding onto him. She kept that pace, occasionally gyrating her hips, moaning and groaning and breathing his name (he really didn't need to know how that sounds). After what felt like an eternity, but was most likely two minutes, Bellamy felt the all too familiar sense of his balls clenching, preparing to release his load and he knew he had to warn her because, even though she's been calling out expletives and his name, that doesn't necessarily mean that she came or that she was close to again.

"Clarke, I'm gonna—"

"Hold on," she called and Bellamy tried, pushing into her relentlessly, knowing that she said it for a reason other than to torture him.

"Clarke—" he groaned, holding back impossibly too long.

"I'm just… I'm right… Okay!" she screamed and he felt her walls contract around him, pulsating and fuck! He couldn't hold back any longer, releasing his load into her as she collapsed onto his chest, her breath hot on his sticky neck.

"That was awesome. B-plus," she smiled against his chest. "You need to push up a little more and even though it's an emasculating position, you should still try to take some control. Grip my hips and really drive up into me. But honestly, for your first time, I'd say you did a pretty bang up job."

"Do I say thanks to the Pun Master or to the Princess?"

"Both, dummy," she smirked, sitting up, having him pull out of her and his dick was chilly from the AC but rock hard again at the sight of Clarke naked again. This time he was definitely checking out her breasts.

Clarke chuckled, "How the hell are you ready to go already? Every guy I've been with has needed ten or so minutes."

"Well, Princess, your boobs do it for me," Bellamy quipped, at the off chance that she'll accept that and they'll do whatever it is that they're going to do next which Bellamy really hoped wasn't getting dressed.

"Give me a minute and I'll be back with lesson two if you're up for it." She stood and crossed the room to the door without any clothes to cover herself and crossed the hall to the bathroom and while waiting, Bellamy crawled up the bed and leaned back against his headboard (seriously, are you even an adult without a headboard?)

He smirked at the sight of her swaying her hips back to him and he was sure she wasn't trying to be sexy and just failing epically. "Lesson two but my third grade?" he pondered and Clarke chuckled, slapping his shoulder as she laid down next to him.

"You didn't need to learn anything in lesson one and do not be cocky about that right now, it's a turn off."

Bellamy rolled his eyes, he's cocky but in a good way… or so he thought. "Round two?" he questioned.

"Yes!" she answered, maybe a little too enthusiastically for their no feelings rule.

"So…"

"You're on top."

Bellamy nodded, giving himself a minute to digest that they're having sex again, with him on top of her, looking right at her gorgeous face and stunningly captivating blue eyes on a normal day let alone the day she takes his virginity, because fuck, he was a virgin no more than fifteen minutes ago. He's going to say something he's going to regret. She'll be right there and he'll either tell her that he's in love with her and has been for years or he's just going to bend down and kiss her for the first time ever and definitely not the way he's thought about doing it.

That's the thing about being a virgin, you care more about kissing someone than you do screwing them. So all Bellamy had thought about was the press of his lips against hers, not how fucking amazing the sex would be. That's not to say he didn't think about having sex with Clarke, he did, he just didn't know what it would actually feel like until now and reality certainly beats his fantasies.

"Ready?" he looked over at her for the first time in what felt like an hour and she gave him an unreadable look.

"Yeah," she told him slowly, blinking. "Are you?"

"Yeah, now spread those gorgeous thighs for me before I spread them for you."

Clarke complied, biting her lip hard and Bellamy wondered if he found a kink of hers, before not caring, rolling onto her and… "Ready, Princess?" he asked softer than he'd like but fuck it, so what if she figures out that he loves her, they've said it before when it was a friendly 'I love you' but this will be more and Bellamy couldn't care at the moment.

Clarke bit her lip and nodded.

Bellamy slid his cock between her folds, hot and wet and amazing, before he slid in with her little gasp and his sigh. He started slow, getting the hang of it, but no one's ever complained about him being a slow learner. No one until Clarke Griffin.

"Bell—!" she groaned, wrapping her legs around his hips and pulling him into her more and Bellamy chuckled before driving into her with so much force that he thought that he was going to break her, knowing it not possible. Every stroke arched her back higher and higher, Bellamy leaned down and pulled her taught nipple into his mouth, nipping with his teeth and soothing with his tongue, with the perfect suction throughout. His hand on her opposite hip, tightened, helping his control as his grunts and moans increased and he was holding back his release, listening to every gorgeous note passing through her lips and he wanted nothing more than to hear those sounds every minute for the rest of his life.

"I need… fingers… Bell…" Clarke moaned as Bellamy pulled his hand from her hip to her clit circling it teasingly before she growled at him and he pressed his fingers into her as his hips slammed into hers and he felt her walls pulsating before euphoric cry, which he already had memorized, to fizzle out before he came with full force. Collapsing onto her.

"I need a minute," he breathed after a moment.

"You're fine until I tell you that you're crushing me."

Bellamy huffed into her neck, breathing in her blonde hair, the three little words on the tip of his tongue but he held back. He couldn't ruin their friendship over how he feels, it wasn't worth losing her.

He rolled off of her and she groaned, pulling the bed sheets around her, it's cold in his room, meaning his landlord finally fixed the AC but April was too soon to turn it on and he scrambled around to join her under the sheets.

"Your landlord is evil," Clarke said softly, curling into him and even though he knew it was for body heat, Bellamy ravished in the feeling of her cuddling with him.

"Immensely," he scoffed.

"Let me know when you're ready for the last lesson," she yawned, and curled into him more, her head on his shoulder and her nails scratching lightly on his chest.

"Do I get to know my grade on this one?" he teased, he didn't care for the grades, but knew it was a way of keeping it clinical so neither of them could read anything more into it than what it was. Clarke teaching him the ropes.

"A-minus, you were a little slow on realizing I needed more stimulation."

"It's not like it's my first time or anything."

Clarke flicked his nipple, rolling her head around so her chin was slightly digging into his collarbone. "You seriously need to stop putting yourself down over that, it really shouldn't matter to anyone. America sucks with the belittling of sex. It's something everyone does, there are many health benefits and it brings children into the world unless otherwise prevented. The fact that you've had women care about you never doing it before is shocking since they've probably had guys walk away from them because of that and knows what it feels like to be rejected."

"I didn't exactly feel rejected."

"I didn't mean that you did, it just sucks that you invested time into these people and they push you away over something so trivial which you're above average at doing with minimal guidance because it's primal response."

"I didn't think that biology could be a turn on but it definitely is when you're also talking about how awesome I am in bed."

"I said above average, I've had better, but you are definitely not the worst, you're in the top twenty percentile."

"Damn, I have to step my game up to be in at least the top ten."

"Already?"

Bellamy shrugged, half forgetting that Clarke was leaning on his shoulder. "Five minutes maybe."

Clarke nodded, a retaliation for him jostling her when he shrugged, her chin digging into his shoulder. "Five minute nap," she smiled and Bellamy sighed definitely wanting that.

A whole hour blew by while they slept and Bellamy groaned when he attempted to roll over, finding Clarke underneath him. "It wasn't a dream?"

Clarke sighed underneath him, "You frequently dream about your best friend showing you the ropes?"

"No, that's why it was so weird."

"Sex with me is weird? You have nothing to compare it to."

"Not my point," Bellamy smirked.

"No, but someone's at a point… that made no sense, I meant an innuendo that said that you're hard."

"I got that."

"So do you want your last lesson or do you think you're good?"

Bellamy really didn't have to think about it, because really? Have sex with Clarke, whom he's half in love with, or go watch Legally Blonde for the billionth time if she sticks around. "What's the lesson?" he asked, not really caring what it was because his answer would always be more sex.

"Doggie," she curled her head into his neck, slightly embarrassed, or maybe she was cold, whatever it was, Bellamy still tried to look down at her. His hand around her waist, scraping his nails against her perfect pale skin, never wanting to let her go.

"Now how can I say no to that?"

They quietly maneuvered themselves into their positions (Bellamy's watched porn, okay?) and Clarke's ass was in the air, slightly swaying and Bellamy was certain she didn't know it was happening but he was entranced, her ass was gorgeous. He didn't take his time like he wanted, this was a lesson, not romance, he reminded himself with a tight grimace.

Stroking his engorged cock against her folds, separating them, he slid in slowly. She was tighter, and flexed around him as she gasped. He slid all the way in and waited a moment to adjust again. Clarke was the first to move and though it wasn't much, it urged Bellamy on.

This was different, this was commanding, and Bellamy had love/ hate feelings towards the act of him slamming into her from behind when he couldn't see her blissed out face, that was his favorite part of this. But the angle was amazing, it was a tossup, see her gorgeous face as he brought her to climax, or bring her to climax more than once, this angle getting her bundle of nerves, bring her closer and closer over the edge quicker than before and Bellamy held out until she was on her third orgasm, on the verge of collapsing when he finally gave in to his release, sighing as he collapsed on her back, kissing her shoulder as he caught his breath.

"That… that was…"

"A-plus?" Bellamy suggested jokingly.

"What? Uh, yeah. A-plus."

Bellamy rolls off of her, covering them both with a blanket again, waiting for her to come around.

"I'm starving," she chuckled.

"What are you in the mood for? I am not cooking so we're using Postmates."

"I'm craving a turkey burger."

Bellamy pulled out his phone and in the app found their favorite burger place and ordered her turkey burger and onion rings that she would never ask him to get even though they're her favorite, stealing his while quietly chomping on the healthier sweet potato fries she hates. He ordered the brunch burger (he's obsessed and well aware of his faults) with onion rings and two chocolate shakes because they deserve the calories. He placed the order and tossed his phone back on the nightstand, not aware of how it even got there.

"What'd you order?" she asked, rolling onto her side and looking at him with an unreadable expression.

"Brunch burger, onion rings and chocolate shake."

"And you got me a shake and sweet potato fries."

"No, I'm not giving into your healthy habits that you hate, you're getting onion rings too because I hate when you steal mine. I'm always left wishing I could have three more but you've already eaten them."

"I only want three!"

"Clarke, don't try acting like I don't know you better than you know yourself, you hate sweet potato fries."

She rolled her eyes, dropping her head back on the pillow. I want to shower before it comes."

"Yeah, should—should be twenty minutes."

Clarke nodded but didn't move and neither did Bellamy. They didn't touch each other and Bellamy knew it was for the best but it was still difficult not to.

Bellamy Blake was head over heels in love with Clarke Griffin. It's official.

The intercom buzzed and Bellamy got up to let the delivery guy in, yanking his sweatpants on and Clarke stretched, going into his bathroom with his t-shirt on (his brain malfunctioned momentarily at the sight) for a shower.

Bellamy waited five minutes. Then ten. Then fifteen before he knocked on the bathroom door concerned about her.

"I don't have a towel," she told him, the water still running and Bellamy knew it was because the AC would have turned her wet body into an icicle and he really didn't need to be thinking about her wet right now.

"There should be a blue one in there that you left here last summer when we went to the beach."

"Could—could you look? The cabinet's on the opposite side of the room and I don't want to get everything soaking wet."

Bellamy groaned, he was starving and also knew going into the same room as a naked Clarke was going to affect him and he didn't need to add that embarrassment to the list of things to leave out of his biography once he's a world renowned anthropologist and people want to write his treacherous climb to success.

He opened the door and grabbed the navy blue towel from the cabinet next to the door before going to the shower and handed it over to Clarke through the wall and plastic curtain.

Suddenly it was ripped open and Clarke stood bare in the shower staring at him with her hand on her hip. "Hop in, we should conserve water."

"Uh," he stuttered. "Dinner?"

"Do you want to eat or do you want to fuck?"

Bellamy's eyes shot up to Clarke's eyes and honestly there was no choice. He needs her like he needs oxygen to breathe. She was his oxygen and he wouldn't give her up for anything.

He dropped the towel on the counter—within their reach—and pushed his sweatpants off his hips, letting them pool on the floor before he stepped into the shower and crowded her against the wall with his body pressed solidly against hers.

"I meant actually shower," she gasped when his tongue licked her pulse point.

Bellamy's fingers trailed up the soft skin of her waist, gliding over her ribs before he cupped her breasts, his thumb nails scraping across her pliant, pink nipples.

"Bell—"

"What do you want, Princess?"

"Eve—everything. Your fingers, your mouth, your—your cock. Please!"

"Princess always gets what she wants, huh?"

"Apparently not," she growled, gripping his shoulders so hard her nails dug in and he growled in retaliation, biting the column of her throat, his hand cupping her sex roughly and the whimper that passed through her lips nearly broke Bellamy's heart. He wanted this forever, he wanted nothing more than Clarke Griffin for the rest of his life and he would never have her, not really.

He would have teased her if his ego wasn't so broken, if she wanted him as much as he wanted her, but that wasn't their reality. So instead, he hoisted her up against the wall at the perfect angle for his engorged cock to slip in and fuck her like there was no tomorrow.

He fucked her like it was his last chance and if he really thought about it, it was, but he liked the abstract, the endless possibilities of the situation changing, fucking her so hard into another dimension where she does want him. She does want to spend their weekends in bed and drive into the country with no real destination and spend an afternoon at the farmer's market finding fruits and vegetables and maybe some artwork, maybe even sell her own artwork.

His orgasm came fast and hard and he realized he hadn't even paid attention to Clarke, if she got off and he hated what casual sex between friends with feelings is, its complicated and painful and he growled into Clarke's ear before he pulled out, making no effort to see if she was good, just poured his shampoo into his hand and slathered his hair in it to get all the sweat and grime off him from the four rounds of casual yet mind blowing sex he just had with his best friend who he just so happened to be in love with.

"I'm going to eat," Clarke announced, reaching out to grab her towel. Bellamy could see their juices trailing down her legs.

"Wash your legs, Clarke."

"You have shampoo in your hair."

"So wait a second, you're making this awkward now and it was your idea in the first place."

"Because you just fucked me!" there was a sense of pain and hurt in her eyes that he couldn't escape, it'll haunt him for the rest of his life.

"I didn't hear any complaints," he said roughly, rinsing the shampoo out of his hair.

"We had sex, I was teaching you the basics. That was fucking, Bellamy, how do you not see the difference?"

"We both wanted to, we both got off, and I asked what you wanted. I don't see the difference or why you're angry."

They switched places so Clarke could clean off her legs, "I'm not angry!"

"Then what the hell are you?"

"I—I don't know, this isn't what I wanted."

"Then you should have said so before anything happened. The last three hours shouldn't have happened if this wasn't what you wanted, Princess," Bellamy stormed out of the bathroom, yanking his towel off the rack and went into his room to dry off, cool down and get dressed all at the same time.

"Bellamy," she called softly at the door five minutes later, her clothes were scattered across the floor of the room and he couldn't handle seeing her naked again. He's never going to see the girl of his dreams naked again because she doesn't want him.

Unrequited love is a bitch.


	2. People Throw Rocks at Things That Shine

**CLARKE:**

She was pacing. It's been a month and she still couldn't believe it. It'd be rude to say so to his face, but still, he's twenty four and… she now understands it, he's fucking big, but she couldn't tell him that either because it was a one-time thing. She took his virginity, showing him the basic ropes of sex (and some hot shower sex she might not be able to stop thinking about).

"What is wrong with you?" Raven asked walking in the door.

"Is O with you?"

"No, Bellamy wanted her home to do something. What's going on with you?"

"I had sex with Bellamy."

Raven laughed, "Fucking finally!"

"What?"

"The sexual tension between you two was nearly palpable."

"What? No, he was… I needed… it had nothing to do with us, it was… we both needed to get laid and going to the bar to pick someone up was too much work so we agreed it was a onetime thing."

"You're a fool in love," Raven shook her head.

"He—he doesn't feel that way, I'm fine with that."

"You're really not."

"Fine, I'm not, but the rules were all mine and I can't just go back on them."

"You can."

"No, Rae, I can't. I can't lose him and I'd rather be his friend for the rest of my life than try for more and lose him forever."

"And what if he's being a bigger idiot than you and doesn't do anything about it either?"

"That's impossibly untrue. He didn't—I feel like I forced him. I know I didn't, but… you don't know everything and I'm guilty of manipulating him."

"You were fine talking to him last week, how could you feel guilty when you practically flirted with him?"

"I did? I was drunk."

"Yeah, you were drunk," Raven chuckled. "I think you hit on Maya too."

"Oh, God, does Jasper hate me?"

"Jasper thought it was a real riot."

"And Bellamy?"

"He was drunk too, flirted back and didn't like that you were flirting with Maya."

"What—I didn't even know I did it."

"That's a problem too, babe. What would you have done if you caught him flirting with Miller?"

Clarke rolled her eyes, "Laugh, Miller isn't his type and Bellamy definitely isn't Miller's."

"So you'll laugh when the guy you like is hitting on someone else?"

"It's Miller!"

"Miller was an example, it could be anyone. It could be me or some random girl in the bar or class or library. Clarke, you could lose him if you don't do something about it because hiding from your feelings is a way of losing him too."

Clarke shook her head. "It's not worth the risk."

"Fine, but I will say I told you so when he comes to the bar with another girl on his arm."

"You have that right."

"You're just going to continue pining, aren't you?"

"Involving a lot of imaginative masturbation."

* * *

A week later, Clarke was sent home with a fever, "You can't help anyone get better when you're sick, Griffin," Jackson said and Clarke rolled her eyes, she wasn't sick, she gets a fever a few days before her period comes, nothing major, usually just under a hundred degrees so it's really nothing and her period runs like clockwork, the perfect twenty-eight day cycle. She had three days before it arrived and along with the fever, she's insanely horny, with only the thoughts of Bellamy's huge dick to get her by. She wasn't against porn, she just preferred remembering how Bellamy's cock felt inside her. Glorious wasn't even the half of it.

"Rae!" she called through the apartment, hoping she was at the shop working for Murphy's dad. Murphy owed her after nearly killing her.

There was no answer so Clarke gladly grabbed a glass of water and headed to her bedroom to relieve some tension. Closing the door behind her because all their friends have keys to the apartment, aside from Bellamy who never came over so there was no need, it's safer for her to close her door than expose herself to all her friends.

She stripped down and put on her most sensual music that really gets her in the mood—Daniel Craig and dvsn—and lays on her bed.

It's a gradual build when thinking about Bellamy, it could go one of two ways when she does this, the easy way where they talk and flirt and it progresses naturally or the one that's more realistic and rough and so Bellamy she can barely last, they fight, they push each other's buttons and when it comes to a head, one of them pushes the other against whatever surface was behind them and devoured the other's mouth. It was a tossup on which one she enjoyed more because they were both delicious fantasies that would never come true.

You don't know babe  
When you hold me  
And kiss me slowly  
It's the sweetest thing  
And it don't change  
If I had it my way  
You would know that you are

Closing her eyes, Clarke trailed her fingers up her stomach as though they were his lips, coming up her to her breasts, grazing her breast and squeezing her nipple until she bit her lip as a wave of ecstasy shot down her spine and she groaned.

You're the coffee that I need in the morning  
You're my sunshine in the rain when it's pouring  
Won't you give yourself to me  
Give it all, oh

She tugged and massaged her breasts for a while before taking her right hand and rubbed her fingers against her clit for the much needed stimulation, her breasts alone weren't cutting it.

She rubbed at her clit rough and quick, bringing herself over the edge quickly, getting the first one out of the way to let the next few come with slightly more ease.

I just wanna see  
I just wanna see how beautiful you are  
You know that I see it  
I know you're a star  
Where you go I follow  
No matter how far  
If life is a movie  
Oh you're the best part, oh  
You're the best part, oh  
Best part

Clarke adjusted the hand between her thighs, rubbing her palm against her clit and letting two fingers slide into her cunt and they weren't as long or thick or rough as Bellamy's but she found an angle that got her so close that she was teasing herself to the point where she was gasping and moaning so loudly and when she did come with the memory of Bellamy pounding into her, his eyes locked on hers with an unreadable expression, his name pushed through her teeth impossibly loud just as she heard a knock on the door.

"Clarke?" she heard Octavia's worries voice through the door. Shit.

It's the sunrise  
And those brown eyes  
You're the one that I desire  
When we wake up  
And then we make love  
It makes me feel so nice

Clarke couldn't say anything, what was she supposed to say?

You're my water when I'm stuck in the desert  
You're the Tylenol I take when my head hurts  
You're the sunshine on my life

"Clarke..?"

"Ye—yeah, O?" she answered, slightly horrified and praying Octavia didn't hear her at all.

"Raven called and wanted to know what you were in the mood for dinner. She wants sushi but will settle for Thai if that's what you want."

Clarke scrambled off her bed, pulling clothes on peaking at the clock, grimacing as she got to the door. "It's two in the afternoon, what are you doing here?"

No matter how far  
If life is a movie  
Then you're the best part, oh  
You're the best part, oh  
Best part

"I had a half day, I think we both know what you were doing here," she smirked.

"What?"

"The music, Daniel Caesar is so good to get off to, that voice," she swoons.

If you love me won't you say something  
If you love me won't you

The voice that reminds Clarke of Bellamy's, she grimaced as she scrambled for her clothes. "Uh, yeah. Jackson sent me home with a fever and—"

"And you thought you'd get off while thinking about my brother?"

Clarke's eyes widened in panic when she opened the door and…

"Relax, I know how his name sounds at climax, I fucking live with him and Roma…" she shook her head at the thought.

"I didn't even know it was him, okay? I started with vague body parts that I wouldn't even know were truly his so I doubt—"

"Quit while you're behind. Just don't do anything to him, he has a fragile heart even though he doesn't let anyone see that."

If you love me won't you say something  
If you love me won't you  
Love me, won't you

The song was over and it changed to something she didn't recognize and Octavia grimaced at her. "You don't like him, do you?"

"I… No," Clarke shook her head, she wasn't about to tell Octavia that it was more than that, that she might love him or maybe have an unhealthy obsession with his gorgeous cock, she can't tell his sister that.

"There's a weird sexual tension between you two when you argue that—"

"No, Octavia, stop. Yes, your brother is hot but he frustrates me to the point of murder, I can't live my life like that," she lied but she's so used to lying to her mother that she thinks she's gotten too good at it for her own good.

"You do know that it's a sign you're meant to be together too."

Clarke gave the younger girl a skeptical look, "Do you and Lincoln fight constantly?"

"Not constantly but we do fight and we make up because it's not a big thing."

"And Bellamy will argue Trump over Clinton with me when he voted for Hillary just like the rest of us. He fights with me just to fight, how is that fair?"

"It's not but maybe he just wants to talk to you, do you ever think of that, if he's arguing with you he has your attention which is what he wants."

"Are you trying to tell me that Bellamy likes me because I just cannot believe that. He—he just can't, he would have… he'd have told me."

Octavia gave her the skeptical look now and Clarke rolled her eyes, over the conversation. "What are you doing here anyway?"

"I couldn't deal with Bell's mood anymore, he's been off the past month."

Month, Clarke thought, shaking it out of her head, there has to be more than sex that's changed for him. "Really? He's been the same around me."

"Because he likes you."

"And he loves you, so he shouldn't be… Thai," she decided on dinner. She didn't want to talk about Bellamy anymore.

"He's Filipino."

"Yeah, we're definitely having Thai, you joining?"

"Lincoln's break is in two hours and he'll text me back then and let me know if we're doing something. I doubt it, he probably has a training session and he doesn't let me go to those."

"You're letting someone tell you what to do? Who are you and what did you do to Octavia?"

"I want him Clarke, if you want something bad enough you accept the boundaries."

"Damn, you're serious."

Octavia smiled and Clarke laughed, "Come on, let's go do something actually fun."

* * *

 **BELLAMY:**

They didn't talk about it. They still hung out and argued about nonsense, but they didn't talk about that night. Bellamy knew it was amazing, not because it was his first time or because he was in love with Clarke but because they were so in sync that Bellamy knew what she needed before she could vocalize it.

That's not to say that things aren't different between them. Their harsh words hit softer, they gravitate towards each other throughout the night. If they touched, it was like a bolt of electricity coursing through him, leaving him wanting her more and more every time.

Their friends planned a joint week vacation renting out a house at Virginia Beach for everyone to stay in, Bellamy initially said no but Octavia convinced him that he deserves a vacation. He'd reluctantly agreed and now dreads it all together. Six days of Clarke in skimpy bikinis and him not being able to do anything about it? Torture and/or death will ensue.

"What is wrong with you?" Octavia spat, slamming the door to the deck outside where all their swimwear clad friends were goofing off while Murphy and Miller manned the grill.

Bellamy grasped his beer tighter in one hand, the other gripping the edge of the island.

"Bellamy Bradbury Blake."

"You cannot tell anyone," he told her sternly.

"Tell anyone what?"

"You can't make fun of me either."

"I promise that I won't make fun of you but I can't promise that I won't use it against you later."

"Fine. I was a virgin until three months ago when Clarke kindly offered to fix the situation so I could keep a girlfriend for once in my life but I was half in love with her then and—"

"And now you're completely in love with her," O finished.

"And she said no feelings."

"You're certain she meant it?"

He nodded, gulping down more beer, "She wouldn't have said it if she didn't mean it and now, because of you, I have to look at her half naked for a week."

"You can't blame me for this, I mentioned the trip before anyone else but you could have told me about sleeping with her. Everyone knows you're in love with her, thinking you're just waiting for the right time to tell her."

"I certainly can't do that now. No feelings," he reiterated.

"Preexisting feelings are different, Bell."

"How?"

"What if she said it to keep herself from getting her hopes up? That she liked you too?"

"I know her better than—" Bellamy shut himself up as the doorknob clicked and Clarke pushed through, both Blakes glaring at her.

"Hey, O, do you mind if I steal Bell for a minute?"

"Sure, maybe you can do something that will break him out of his funk," Octavia told her, glaring at Bellamy on her way back outside.

Bellamy downed the rest of his beer and grabbed another from the fridge.

"Are you mad at me?"

"Why would I be mad at you?"

Clarke shrugged, "I owe you a blow job."

"You really don't," he grimaced, leaning back against the counter.

"I—I told you I would and I haven't."

"I told you I didn't care."

"So why are you treating me like I killed your dog?"

"I'm not."

"You are, ever since that night three months ago."

"That night," Bellamy scoffed.

"You want me to call it the night I took your virginity?"

"How about the night we had sex? That's what happened four times and like you said, it's not a big deal unless you're pregnant."

Clarke took a step back and licked her lips, "I'm not, but I didn't think it'd ruin our friendship."

"I knew I should have said no when you offered," he shook his head. "But I had—"

"Bellamy, please, I—I want us to be okay again, I can't lose you too."

"That's not fair! I'm not them!"

"I—I know, but you're—you mean more to me than Wells did and—and losing you will ruin me," her voice broke a few times and Bellamy nearly reached out to her, but he couldn't. If he touched her, he would have acted as though everything was fine, but it wasn't. He was never going to be with her.

"Clarke, why did you offer it?"

"Because I—"

"Don't bullshit me either," he growled.

Clarke didn't say anything, wringing her fingers together before closing the distance between them, pushing up onto her toes, one hand taking purchase on his shoulder, while the other cupped his jaw. Bellamy was frozen with anticipation or shock, as Clarke's lips pressed against his.

She pulled away far too quickly but Bellamy couldn't blame her, he was too shocked to kiss her back. She licked her lips and her hands pulled away. "I thought—" she whispered, stopping to collect her thoughts properly, always ten questions ahead, before looking at him. "I thought having sex with you would get me over you, you were a virgin, you were supposed to suck at it, but…"

Bellamy bit back his hurt and anger and asked, "But?"

"How many girls have seen your dick?"

"What?" he grimaced, this was an unexpected turn.

"Aside from me, how many girls saw your dick?" she asked again.

"Six maybe, what does it matter?"

Clarke bit her lip and that was an image Bellamy didn't need combined with the bikini. "Because you're—you're big," her eyes widened so he'd understand completely.

"Oh, did I hurt you?"

"Gloriously," she smiled. "I downplayed everything, Bellamy. That was the best sex of my life and I downplayed it because losing my best friend wasn't an option. I could ignore my feelings as long as it meant you were in my life."

"What feelings, Clarke?"

"I'm in love with you. I definitely didn't know it in the beginning, I knew you'd take care of me because that's who you are, but I—"

"You love me? What the fuck is wrong with you, Clarke?" he exclaimed, louder than intended and he knew their friends would be drawn to his outburst. "Why would you… this was your idea, this was all your idea and your rules and how can you possibly say no feelings. No awkwardness. One. Time. Occurrence. You can't say that and then come back to me three months of awkwardness with feelings and wanting more. You can break your rules, but I can't? How is that fair? Tell me how you think that is fair!"

"It's… it's not," she said quietly. "And I shouldn't have been afraid of how you… there was a chance you don't love me back, Bell, and I—how am I supposed to see you every day feeling more for you than you do for me, how is that fair to me?"

"Because…" because life is about risks. Because telling someone how you feel and being rejected makes moving on easier (hypocrite). Because I love you. "I do."

"What?"

"I love you."

"Don't say it if you don't mean it," Clarke shook her head.

Bellamy laughed, "Why do you think I'm in here instead of out there with the rest of you? I couldn't see you dressed in next to nothing and not—"

"Kiss me. Bellamy, kiss me."

Bellamy tilted his head down and finally kissed Clarke, her lips were soft and plump and everything that Bellamy imagined and more. He pulled her flush against him, he's half hard and he wanted her to know what she does to him, what she's always done to him. He'd usually be embarrassed, he'd usually refrain from having them fully against him, but this was Clarke, this was his Princess and something about her made him give up all his worries and insecurities (unless it's about her and O, he'll always worry about them).

He couldn't get enough, they barely pulled away for a breath before diving right back in and she didn't want it to ever end either, if her fingers forking through his hair and latching on meant anything. Bellamy was overwhelmed and ecstatic and Clarke's tongue licked into his mouth and Bellamy growled. If they didn't stop, he was going to screw her right then and there and their friends were right outside.

"Clarke—" he groaned as she pulled him back down to her. "Clarke."

She pulled away and Bellamy sighed, "I want nothing more than to continue this, but our friends are right outside and they are way too invested in our love lives."

"So should we pretend that we're not…"

"What are we exactly?"

"Dating. Improperly, but we'll get there," she smiled and Bellamy pressed a kiss to her lips quickly.

"Right."

"I'm definitely going to blow you later, by the way," she breathed.

Bellamy's mind drifted to what that meant, because the thought of her on her knees in front of him, he couldn't be thinking about that when they're about to go back out to their friends. "Walk on the beach at twilight?" he asked, changing the direction.

"Perfect first date," Clarke smiled again, she appears to not be able to dampen her smile.

"Cool. I owe Miller a beer, promised on my way in and it's been far too long. Head back out and I'll see you in a minute?"

Clarke nodded, sneaking another kiss to Bellamy's lips and pulled away, opening the door with a schooled expression.

"Clarke," he called before she left. "I love you."

She beamed at him and winked before going back to their friends.

* * *

"Octavia found me masturbating to the thought of you two months ago."

Bellamy choked on his beer, they were walking on the beach like he promised, it was just at sunrise instead because Never Have I Ever was much more important to their competitive sides than romantically walking along the water. His beer was his hair of the dog, too hung over to really be enjoying the walk, always loving the company. "What?"

"So I oddly get a fever the week before my period comes and two months ago, it coincidentally happened to be when I had my physical for work and Jackson sent me home early. So what am I going to do with a free afternoon? Masturbate to the memory of my best friend screwing my fucking brain out the month before because I couldn't actually have him."

"We're idiots for thinking that."

"We are but we've moved past it so we're all good," she smiled, pressing a kiss to his shoulder.

Bellamy smiled, they couldn't stop touching last night either. They were stealthy about it, they sat next to each other and hid their hands under the table or Bellamy would drape his arm across the back of Clarke's chair or she'd touch his arm as she laughed hysterically hard at whatever idiotic explanation was given for someone's Never Have I Ever, it was truly great.

"Do you think they'll figure it out if we don't tell them?" Clarke asked, sitting in the sand to watch the sun come up over the water.

"I think we could be civil and cordial and wait for them to figure it out. If they figure it out," Bellamy rolled his eyes, sitting behind her so she could lean back against his chest, she loved doing it on movie nights when everyone started hanging out together. It's a habit now, one Bellamy will never be ready to give up.

"Mmm, I don't know, that might be asking too much of us, you're wrong about a lot of things," she smiled back at him fondly.

"Sure, I am. So," he smirked, playing with the hem of the tiny sleep shorts she was wearing. "You were thinking about me?"

"I always have," she sighed. He'd barely touched her and she's raw like this, Bellamy was in utter awe of his princess.

His hand trailed from her shorts to her inner thigh, so high up he was practically stroking her hot, slick folds.

"Bell," her breath hitched.

"What do you want, baby?"

"We shouldn't do this on the sand, it's… unsanitary."

Bellamy began pulling his hand away.

"I didn't say stop."

He chuckled lightly into her, licking and nipping a trail down the column of her throat she willingly exposed to him. He pushed aside her shorts and stroked her fingers lightly over Clarke's panties. She groaned, pushing against his fingers. "You're such a tease," she whined.

"Says the girl who owes me a blow job."

"I'll owe you two then. I'll throw a hummer in there too, if you don't give it away for the rest of the week."

"I'm never going to be able to take you out," Bellamy groaned into her neck, wanting to take her out, just the two of them.

"Of course you will, Mr. Feminist."

"Not the crazy misandry feminist, right?"

"Equal rights feminist, definitely because I propositioned you twice, our kids are going to make fun of you for not just asking me," she chuckled and Bellamy bit her neck, rougher than before in retaliation. "Hey!"

"You propositioned me for emotionless sex and then told me to kiss you three months later, how was I supposed to know what your mixed signals meant?"

"Doesn't matter, we just can't tell our kids how we went from friends to lovers until they're married."

"You're thinking about our kids?"

"Hypothetical future children. Don't tell me you haven't thought about them, because I know you better than that, Mr. Blake."

"I'm not talking about them as though they're real," he chuckled.

"So this is a thing we're doing, talking about kids barely twelve hours into this relationship?"

"I will talk about our children whenever you want because you're the only woman I intend on having them with."

"Bellamy—"

"I know, I fell for the person I lost my virginity to, I don't really care about how big of a cliché I am."

"It doesn't count, you loved me before we had sex."

"Really?"

"Really," Clarke confirmed.

* * *

Four days later, everyone spent their last afternoon packing their bags for the four hour drive in the morning so Clarke looked to Bellamy and told everyone that they're going for the last pizza and beer run, wanting some alone time without their friends knowing what they were doing.

The minute they were out of the driveway Clarke's hand was in Bellamy's and he sighed, fully content.

"So we're going to the beer store, pizza place, and the car rental place."

"Wait, why?" he grimaced.

"For us, we're going to lie to our friends and say we have job interviews in Petersburg when they're going 64 back to Arcadia, we'll go 460 instead. We'll get a rental even though we don't have job interviews, I already told them we did so it's not a surprise. I also said you're nervous so that's why they didn't bring it up to you."

"You're sneaky."

"They also think we're going to kill each other," she smirked.

"We would have a week ago."

"True, they think we're in a truce for the week, they're idiots."

"What does it mean, if we surround ourselves with idiots?"

"That we're bigger idiots, but I like being an idiot if it means being with you."

Bellamy gagged, "I'm choking on your corniness."

"You love it."

Bellamy hummed, turning into the beer store parking lot, "I love you."

Clarke smiled, "I'm so giving you a bunch of blow jobs on the drive back."

"You do know I've told you that I love you three times and you've said it once."

"You made me say it because you were being an asshole!"

"Clarke," he grimaced, getting out of the car, his hand slipping from hers.

She rushed out after him, stopping him in the middle of the parking lot, "I love you. I do, but I don't want to say it because I have to."

"I like hearing it, I thought for so long that you wouldn't or—or couldn't, I just want to hear it," he confessed sheepishly, he's been pining for her for so long he truly just needed to be reminded that they're on the same page now, that they're together in this.

"Bell," Clarke cupped his cheek and pulled his face to look down at her. "I love you. I love you. I'm completely in love with you and I'm not going anywhere," she leaned up and pressed her lips to his softly before his phone rang and she jumped back.

Bellamy ignored it, pulling her back to him and kissed her with no abandon. "We're coming clean when we get back home," he sighed, his forehead pressed against hers.

"This week has been fun but it sucked not being able to lust at you in all your muscled glory with everyone watching."

"I did it anyway," Bellamy laughed, pulling away to go into the store. He pulled his phone out and stopped short.

"What?"

"You got us a hotel room in Petersburg?"

"Yeah, we're—I left my phone at the house and they called to confirm, didn't they?"

"Yep, and all our friends now know because you got a room with a king size bed and not two doubles."

"Fuck, whatever, they were going to find out in two days anyway," she shrugged and pulled him along into the beer store. "It won't change the fact that I'm in love with you just because everyone now knows."

"You definitely need to bring it up in every sentence, its music to my ears."

"Shut up! You're so annoying!" she groaned but Bellamy knew she was smiling like the beautiful fool she is.

* * *

As they knew their friends spent the whole evening mocking them, calling them idiots because they've known it was going to happen for years (they've only known each other for two). Clarke and Bellamy ignored it, Clarke maintaining the fact that they wouldn't know if she hadn't left her phone to charge because her charger broke and Raven wouldn't let her borrow hers. It's all Raven's fault.

They left the next morning in the rental—a Camaro convertible, everyone was jealous and Clarke is amazing—and halfway to Petersburg, Clarke's hand slipped from Bellamy's to his thigh and he didn't say anything, just let her do whatever it was she thought she could while he was driving down the highway going eighty miles per hour.

Her hand crept farther and farther up his thigh and when she got to his crotch she palmed his length in her hand through his jeans and Bellamy's breath hitched. "Clarke—" he warned.

"You're an old man driver and I never break my promise."

"We're going to die," he breathed, shaking his head.

"That's what cruise control is for."

Bellamy groaned as Clarke unbuttoned his jeans.

"Cruise control, all you'll have to think about is steering."

"You're a menace," he smirked, her fingers pulling down the zipper of his jeans.

"You love it."

"Occasionally."

Clarke pulled his jeans down as much as she could and pulled his erection free from his boxers. She wrapped her hand around its girth and she smiled, her fingers barely reached around its circumference.

"Just breathe and focus on the road."

"Clarke…"

"I know, babe. I believe in you," she kissed his cheek before bending down and licked the tip of his cock.

He was so large that Clarke knew she wouldn't be able to fit him all the way in her mouth, so she needed the help of her hand and a lot of spit. She spit down his shaft, letting it wrap around her fingers and began stroking him as her tongue circled the pink mushroomed tip.

She listened to Bellamy's breathing, she heard it over the wind and passing cars, over the radio. She listened to his startled breath. His pinched inhales, his deep groans. She hollowed her cheeks around him as much she could as she sucked, drawing a dark primal growl out of him.

"Clarke, I—" he growled again. "I'm gonna…

She sucked wilder, sloppier and her throat filled with his musky seed and it was one of the best things Clarke has ever tasted.

"Fuck, babe, I love you," he sighed, turning the car off the interstate while she hid his softening cock away again.

"You're just saying that because I blew you."

"Never just," he smirked, looking over to her. "Hungry?"

Clarke licked her lips. "Yeah, but not for food," her voice dark and heady, seeing the want in Bellamy's eyes come back with full force.

"We have two more hours until the hotel. You can wait."

"You don't want me?"

"I always want you, but right now we can't."

"Says who? There's a bathroom in there," she nodded to the diner Bellamy was pulling the car into.

"You're insatiable, and you have a problem."

"Would you rather me not ache for you to fill me? Make me feel complete, whole again."

Bellamy smirked, parking the car, "Is that so?"

"What? Did you not feel complete?"

"Yeah, I did, but I thought it's because I love you."

Clarke smiled, "You definitely need to say that more."

"Don't you worry your pretty little mind. You're going to hear it a hell of a lot, Princess."


End file.
